Wednesday, January 27, 2010


Deep down I knew I wouldn't really like this but I wanted to give it a shot. I really wanted to like it. Honest I did. Why else would I subject myself to almost 3 hours of tall smurfs cavorting in an Enya video? I mean - other than as a member of Earth 2010, I felt like I had to see this movie and to be part of the conversation.

Well - I can now participate in the conversation. So on that front, I don't regret seeing this movie. And on the I got some Listmaker relax time during SHR's European jaunt front, this movie was also a rousing success.

Unfortunately, the only major successful thing about this movie was that it made me long for the campy Billy Zane to save it. What a big piece of poop this movie is. Yet it is perfect poop. I see why people like it. The special effects are almost really great. The spiritual stuff makes this seem almost kind of deep. The theme of tying our current wars into the proceedings help the viewer think that there is even more depth to the movie than the 3D glasses offer.

Five minutes into this movie I knew I had made a mistake if I was hoping to be entertained. Yes, there were some interesting fight scenes but not nearly enough to sustain my attention for almost 3 hours. Then again some of the dialogue and ideas were so over the top that I do have to give credit to Mr. Cameron. Come on people - stop making fun of the hard to find mineral being called unobtainium. That's kind of funny.

The problem with this movie is that there isn't enough of that kind of silliness. There are too many ultraserious points to make and a 3rd grader's idea for romance plot points to hit for that kind of camp. At least Titanic had that going for it. What happened to the days when Cameron could make a bloated boring movie like The Abyss and then it would just sort of be disregarded. Now he does it and his films are considered landmarks in movie history. Strange.

And what was up with those spirit thingies floating all around?

And the one saving grace was supposed to be the technology but it didn't blow me away in the way that I was hoping it would be. It was okay. This movie is being discussed as changing cinema. But I never really felt like I was ever watching anything all that original. Yes there are the comparisons to Ferngully and Pocahantas. Definitely. But I also felt like I was watching parts of Return of the Jedi or the innumerable amount of films about humans landing on another planet from Alien to Starship Troopers.

Cameron likes to think that this film is a cinematic gamechanger in the way that The Matrix was. It is not. As I was watching that film, I felt like I had never seen anything like it before. Not the case with this movie. Hell, didn't The Matrix even have a similar sort of plot of virtual reality/avatar kind of thing?

Guaranteed Best Picture winner though.

Directed by James Cameron
Edgewater NJ Multiplex


Linsey said...

Hey Uncle Dan! :D I've been reading some of your movie reviews and I was kind of waiting for you to do an Avatar review.

I only went to see this movie because everyone was making a big uproar about it. On a scale of 1 to 10 I would rate this movie a 4.

The movie was insanely predictable.
After the guy was told to spy on the aliens, I was just waiting for the him to save everyone.
And the 3D was very disappointing; it was no different than watching a movie that wasn't in 3D. Fairy-pollen isn't very exciting to see "right in front of you".
The special effects were its only redeeming factor.

So overall, I thought this movie was pretty bad, and it doesn't really deserve all the hype that it's getting.

Kasey disagrees though, she thought the movie was good.

Listmaker said...

hey linsey,

nice to see you here.

i hope to hear more of your movie opinions moving forward!

what's your take on titanic?

Linsey said...

Since the last time I watched Titanic was about ten years ago, I don't really remember much about it haha~~ I'll have to watch it over.

I do remember a lot of romantic drama and sad music to correspond with it.
And water... on the boat... and a lot of people screaming for other people to get off the boat. And the people floating in the water for a long time...
That's about all I remember.

But I'll be sure to get back to you on the subject once I watch it again!

Jim said...

So you know how you said you just got the standard red and blue 3D glasses? At my showing we got these clear wraparound ones. Maybe you got cheated out of the truly fantastical visual experience that Cameron intended. I thought the effects were pretty cool, but the story was obviously a complete joke. I had about the lowest expectations possible for it though, so I ended up liking it slightly better than I expected.

Listmaker said...


so the last time you saw titanic, you were 4 years old?

damn this changes everything! i think i have to see it again to compare.

Linsey said...

@ Listmaker -
Yeah, it's kind of hard to believe, but I never really got around to seeing it a second time.
My mom doesn't really like the movie haha~